Real Travel Adventures of Deb and Debb – Part 1: Trip Planning
Post cover image: Northern Thailand view (D Donnelly, 2005), The full quote by Lao Tzu can be found here.
Deb taking a photo from the front of our canoe
on the Yukon River (2014).
There seems to be a plethora of travel blogs about the 20- and 30-somethings travelling around the globe. These are often aimed at backpackers and wealthy glamping couples and highlight fit, lovely, youthful travellers in stylish videos and frequently include extensive trekking and vigorous activities. There are several very good senior travel blogs, but again they seem to cater to those who are already retired and are travelling at a leisurely pace. But there is nothing for a 50- something (almost 60-something), who is still employed full-time. I couldn’t find a good blog that provided excellent advice on trip planning for a more mature (non-retired) clientele that may be on a more limited budget and with definitely more time constraints. I plan to change this.
My friend Deborah and I (Deb and Debb) are finally finding time to go on an adventure together. We have known each other for over 40 years. The closest we ever came to a trip together was when she visited me in the Yukon back in 2014 and I took her biking, hiking and canoeing for a week in and around Whitehorse. This year’s trip together has been highly anticipated by the both of us. This blog post will be part one of the ‘Real Travel Adventures of Deb and Debb’.
WHERE you plan to go is always the first question in planning a trip. Earth is a big place, and there are a lot of exotic locales. The answer to this question will influence all the following questions. This year I am planning a trip to northern Thailand and northern Vietnam.
I have travelled quite extensively for work and for pleasure but haven’t spent any real time in Southeast Asia. You might be wondering WHY I would choose to go there? I have family who live in northern Thailand, and I haven’t had the opportunity to visit before now (work and other obligations always seemed to get in the way). I also had a very lovely Vietnamese boyfriend (Loi Van) when I was too young to really appreciate who he was, but he generously taught me a lot about his culture, and subsequently I’ve always wanted to go. These reasons may be sufficient to decide on a locale. But as you get older you may need to consider your physical capacity and the number of travel opportunities you might still have left. You may have listed every country on your bucket list, but some just start to rank higher as you narrow those last two considerations down.
When I travelled when I was younger, I never needed to think about those things, money was always more of an issue then. I admittedly also didn’t research heavily before arriving at a new destination, I would just take it all in on arrival. What I learned over the years is that sometimes you would find out about some cool site or museum or food that you wish you had known about, because it was right where you were; but you didn’t, and you may not get another chance to go back. Post-travel regret is a real thing! Now I spend more time doing research in advance. I may still miss out on things, but there is less regret when I return, because I will have made the best choices of the places I wanted to go to and experiences I hoped to have with at least a modicum of awareness. This has the added benefit of making the trip planning more exciting as you consider options and learn about new things.
I am an archaeologist and environmentalist (feel free to check out the rest of my website). So, I did research on these two topics in advance. I really want to learn about the natural and cultural heritage of the places I will visit.
“I feel you can only really appreciate a place when you go with an open heart, an open mind, and at least a basic understanding of the history.”
Knowing a few phrases in the local language is also immensely useful and I have found people worldwide are appreciative of the efforts you have taken to learn elementary communication in their language. I have personally known the challenge of being in a country where no one spoke my (native) language, and the enormous relief I have felt when someone took the time to try and communicate with me is extremely memorable for me.
Because this series of posts will be about Deb too, I asked her a few questions so that you could get her perspectives as well. Her answers are in blue.
Why are you interested in visiting northern Thailand and northern Vietnam? (Deb) I am always interested in going to places I’ve never been before so although I’ve travelled to Thailand twice in the past, I never made it to northern Thailand and always wanted to see Chiang Mai. I’ve heard it is very different from southern Thailand. Regarding Vietnam - friends who have travelled to Vietnam have told me how beautiful the countryside is and how friendly the Vietnamese people are. I think planning a trip to northern Thailand therefore provides the opportunity and natural adjunct to also explore northern Vietnam as I’ve never travelled to either of these places yet.
What are your main considerations in your travel planning – inspirations, experiences you hope to gain? (Deb) I love to learn and explore this incredibly beautiful world that we live in – there is so much to see! When travel planning, I hope to understand and experience the culture and people of the places I go. I especially like to try local foods and wander through the markets (Debb - me too) or enjoy the music of a specific place. I particularly find the people you meet when travelling (mostly locals or other fellow travellers) are the highlight on any trip and they make it more memorable. I think travelling to foreign places is the best education and opens you up to a better understanding of other cultures. It also makes you appreciate what you have and not what you don’t have when returning to Canada.
Next comes WHO. This is a vitally important part of the equation. I have travelled a great deal by myself and would say this is often my preference. Of course, it is wonderful to have some memories with the people you love, and when I finally got married (at age 50) I realized how nice it is to have those shared experiences. My husband is not coming with me on this trip though. While I initially thought I would be travelling alone and knew that some of my time would be spent with my relatives in Thailand, when I mentioned the planned trip to my long-time friend (Deborah) she told me that she had also been planning to go to Vietnam next year. We decided in fairly short order that maybe this was the trip we had hoped we would take together one day.
Now, this is a difficult lesson. Not all of your friends make good travel companions. Sometimes you find out too late that your interests are very divergent and the idea of a good time for one might be lying on a beach or partying, and the other wants to trek in the mountains to take photographs of unique flora and fauna. Really getting down to the expectations of each person, before you decide to travel together, is absolutely necessary.
I have many good acquaintances, but I honestly would not wish to travel with a lot of them. Sharing space with someone can be challenging if they want different things than you. I don’t particularly want to spend the bulk of my money on first class fights and 5-star hotels. I would rather spend my time and money on experiencing the culture, eating great food, and trying new things. I like taking the ‘road less travelled’ and I would sincerely hope that my travel companion would too. It isn’t my intention to travel to some far-flung galaxy country to spend most of my time in a hotel pool. The room (in my opinion) is for stashing my bags and a place to shower and sleep. It just needs to be secure and clean. This however is a very personal predilection, and those conversations should be had early on. I have been known to choose an upscale hotel for a night or two, if it has some historical significance!
Other considerations are the eating habits of your companion – will this make food choice challenging? Sleeping habits can also be grating if you are a morning person and the other is a night owl, or your companion is a heavy snorer, and you are a light sleeper. I recommend getting to really know the person you might want to travel with (and their preferences) before making the decision to put your relationship on the line.
Don’t forget that when you travel with someone else, they likely also have interests that may differ from your own and compromise is crucial. This is their holiday too!
I asked Deb the following questions about travelling companions.
What have you learned about travelling alone versus travelling with a friend? How do you choose who you want to travel with? (Deb) Travelling solo has the obvious advantage that you can decide where and what you want to do each day with carefree abandon. (Debb – I love this!) Your time is your own so you may decide to fill the day (or not) with activities or sights. Wandering on your own also sometimes opens up opportunities to meet people easier as you may appear more approachable.
Travelling with a friend is probably the best because you can explore a place together and talk about the experiences you have, and have fun over meals. Any ‘hiccups’ (e.g. delayed flights, lost baggage, etc.) on a trip, seems less stressful if you can share how to resolve them with your travelling companion. I have the worst sense of direction so if I had a friend to travel with, depending on their navigational skills, either we’d be lost together OR they’d steer us in the right direction! Haha!
Choosing who to travel with usually involves a shared interest and acceptance and respect for the people and culture where you’re travelling to. I couldn’t travel with someone who is rigid in their plans or refuses to try local food as I find being flexible (a more ‘organic’ type of travel), can lead to more fulfilling experiences. I don’t need to have someone with exactly the same interests that I have but it is more the attitude about travelling that I would look for when choosing who I’d want to travel with. Specifically, curiosity, willingness to explore, being flexible and patient if needed would be some factors to take into account when considering who to travel with.
I couldn’t agree more Deb – that’s why I’m so looking forward to travelling with you!
What are your major concerns when travelling alone? – (Deb) As a woman traveller, I think a major concern is safety. I have experienced some dicey situations in the past (e.g. being followed by unsavory guys on city streets or via a motorcycle); scams on tourists as targets to steal money or valuables, and just getting an uneasy feeling. Depending on the place, I would restrict whether I would go out at night alone.
WHEN you travel is also a significant consideration when it comes to planning. What is the local climate at that time of year, is it the high season for tourists? These questions play a role in where you may wish to go. I personally prefer to go when I won’t be surrounded by a gazillion tourists. The timing of course also depends on work responsibilities and when it is an opportune time to be away from the office. Some of the over-touristed sites can be eliminated if you research in advance and plan accordingly. That isn’t to say that you need an itemized schedule for each minute of each day, spontaneity does have its place (also important that your travel partner agrees to this).
I like to know in advance what is in and around the places I will be visiting, but remain open to learning about and accepting new opportunities that may arise once you are there. If you have a very definitive schedule but you aren’t enjoying some aspect, you could consider doing something else. Likewise, if you decide you want to stay longer somewhere, be open to the idea of getting to experience something different that just may be equally or more exciting. My greatest advice is to plan but be flexible.
Time of year and expected climate play a role in WHAT to take with you. An added benefit of travelling with a companion is shared hotel costs, and shared luggage. You likely don’t both need to pack laptops, electric adapters or even camera tripods and umbrellas – but you should decide who is bringing what in advance. Travel light is my philosophy. Perhaps it was my years of military service and limited space onboard ships for non-essentials that has been the overriding factor in this perspective. There can be a tendency to bring too much (which you then have to lug around), and most of it will (in my experience) never gets used.
There are a few essentials that I do always take:
Photocopies of important documents (passport, visas, driver’s license, hotel names/addresses, etc.) in case your purse, backpack or phone gets stolen
Two sets of undergarments – one to wear and one to wash; I also bring a bar of laundry soap (not flakes or liquids which can cause difficulties when going through airport security) in order to wash them in the sink.
Maximum 2 sets of footwear – one for comfort (walking/hiking) and one pair that is more adaptable (perhaps a comfortable dress shoe or sandal) – again consider the season and climate in deciding this, as well as planned activities.
Some local currency for your destination (to get transportation to your hotel, or to buy potable water on arrival) without having to wait in long lines at the airport to exchange money after a long flight. Check the limits on foreign and domestic currency you are allowed to bring into each country before you go.
A notebook – for communication, capturing ideas and memories
Deb wished to share the following piece of advice as well, “What I've learned is to try to book your first and last night's hotel room so you have a place to go when arriving in a foreign place and after a long flight AND when leaving a country, you can hopefully get a good night's sleep and pack for the flight home.” This is great advice particularly if you are camping for the rest of your trip. It is also important for visa applications and to confirm where you will be staying on arrival - often asked by customs officers.
I will be writing separate blog posts about how I researched for this trip, my full packing list, and on travel security and travel health. After our trip I will also post about the amazing (and perhaps not so amazing) places we visited, including the best places to eat - so check those out if you are interested.
Feel free to send Deb and me questions or suggested topics you want to see in the comments section below. Happy travelling!
